Get Him Off Your Mind Tip: No More Rose-Colored Glasses!
This week’s video is about relationships, and the ever-so-common pitfall that many of my clients run into. That’s right…it’s another Get Him Off Your Mindtopic! The subject is so prevalent that I created a program called Get Him Off Your Mind in 28 Daysto help women cope with just this issue. Women from all over the world – powerful, educated, intelligent women – are going through this, so if it’s happened or is happening to you, you’re not alone.
Today I have a tip that will help nip the need to get someone off your mind in the bud at the very get-go.
Breaking Patterns
I have a client who is very pretty and is a wonderful, loving, spiritual person. Yet she has a pattern of dating guys who treat her like dirt. It happens so much that she knows it’s a pattern and is dedicated to working on herself to heal this. It has definitely impacted her self-esteem, which is what she is focused on repairing. We were talking about yet another guy who let her down and the negative impact it had on her life.
She remembered that when she first met him, she had a bad feeling in her gut. She wasn’t sure if it was a fear based on her past patterns, or really her intuition, but it turned out to be her intuition after all. In that conversation, we came to the conclusion that the only way to break this pattern (other than, of course, inner work), is to get a crystal clear idea of who the guy is at the very get-go. Before there’s too much interest, and before things get off the ground.
No More Rose Colored Glasses.
I have another client, a successful, beautiful entrepreneur and young grandmother. She had gotten engaged to a guy who made her very happy. Until she had a serious illness. He disappeared on her, and after some other troubling issues, she booked a session with me to get the real scoop on who he was and if he would change. In this session, it was revealed that he is basically a Peter Pan type of guy who will never grow up and wants to live in Never-Never Land forever. NOT the kind of guy she wants to be married to. She broke off the engagement.
While it is so wonderful to just fall in love, it helps to see things very clearly before your emotions jump on board and get you all caught up with someone. That means taking off those beautiful rose-colored glasses and looking at things very clearly and analytically. It’s not very fun, but it is practical and can save you from a lot of pain down the line.
Trust Your Gut and Make a List of Pros and Cons!
Most people show you their best selves in the beginning of a relationship. That’s where you can get swept away! So before any of your emotions are on the line, get a clear sense of who this person is. What’s his status? What is he about? Make a list of pros and cons and HIGHLIGHT THE RED FLAGS! They won’t go away; in fact, they will likely get worse as time goes by.
You’re intuitive. We all are! The key here is to not get caught up in the fairy tale. It will save you so much heartache in the end. Think about it! Let’s say you’re dating this person you had some serious qualms about in the beginning. Two years go by…and then you break up. You take two or three more years to work on yourself and heal, and BAM, that’s five years of your life that flew by!
Don’t sacrifice what you really need just because he is a guy who likes you. Put yourself first by being strong, not getting swept away, and seeing who he is very clearly. And above all, don’t compromise!!
