This week I’m continuing the conversation about relationships – namely, when you’re into somebody who isn’t good for you. Either they’re not returning your affections, or they don’t know you exist, or you finally realize it’s just not working out. Whatever the case, it’s time to move on – but you’re finding that difficult to do!
As you know, I created a program called Get Him Off Your Mindspecifically for women who are going through this. It’s chock full of energy healings and everyday practices to help you get your power back and reclaim your life.
And as for you amazing men out there, I am sorry I don’t have a Get Her Off Your Mind program available for you right now! I know you go through this too, but my main experience over the years has been with helping women, and I can only teach what I reallyknow. Men go through this too, though, and I do not mean to exclude you guys. I love you! And today’s video applies to both men and women alike.
Trace the Issue back to it’s Origin
If you find yourself in a situation where you can’t get someone off your mind, one of the things that can help is to stop and think about whether or not you have experienced a similar situation in the past. For example, when I was working on getting someone off my mind a while back, I realized this had first happened to me with a boy I liked in 10th grade, after my mom had died. He was unlike anyone I had ever met – the first and only punk/goth kid at school. I became goth because of him!!!! He transferred in during the school year and we became fast friends. I didn’t realize I actually had a crush on him until he was shipped off to live with his dad. And then I was completely and utterly devastated.
What typically happens is, an original issue (and by that I mean when it first begins, usually when you are young) has to do with karma. You go through it, you’re in pain, it sucks, and it shapes a part of who you are. Then, as you go through life, you inadvertently repeat it or allow situations to happen where you are in that same pattern again and again and again.
Unhealthy Patterns CAN be Broken!
The minute you know you have set up a disruptive pattern, karma or not, you can stop it and break it. So, something starts out being karma and it’s hard, but then because we don’t know any better we just keep doing the same. But when we get fed up with that, or realize that it just keeps on happening, that’s when we have the power to change it. Our awareness of it is the key!!!
Self-Sabotage
Oftentimes, with original karma that sets itself into a pattern, it’s like this weird, twisted unfair self-sabotage thing that is happening. For example, if you are engaging with someone and it’s not working, it’s like a withholding or withdrawal of love and affection that you are acutely aware of. You crave love, affection, and attention. That is beautiful! In a great situation, the other person would reciprocate, and you would have a great relationship with them.
When that is not happening, it creates a pain story. You just experience more of the same. It becomes so devastating that it can really crush you. It’s all-encompassing, and you feel like you are never going to get out of it. When you finally do, you go through life and then a few more years later, you experience the same thing all over again – unless you break the pattern with your intention.
It’s all about the Genesis
Again, one of the most effective ways to stop a pattern and heal it is to trace it back to the genesis, the origin. In many circumstances, I’ve discovered that there was a withholding of love from childhood. I know I experienced that, even before my high school goth crush. My mother divorced my father, who I loved dearly, when I was 3, and then wouldn’t let him have visitation. He’s a wonderful man and I am only now realizing just how very painful it was to lose him as a child. I’m tearing up right now just thinking about this as I write – so I know I still have healing and clearing work to do around that.
So, if you can just think back to your childhood and discover where the issue first started, experiencing the emotions by either writing the story out or just talking about it/meditating/etc.. it will help. It may take time, even decades, if you’re like me, but hey – what’s a better way to spend your time than to improve yourself!
Destructive patterns can be broken. We’re not doomed or destined to struggle forever!
We are all here to learn, grow, heal, and recover those parts of ourselves that are broken. To bring them back together and to be whole again. And romantic relationships are the perfect playing field for personal growth.
I hope this helps! Thanks for reading and watching. And remember, if there’s anything in your life that you would like assistance with, I’m here to help with readings, energy healings, on-demand meditations and my psychic development training program. So just reach out!