It’s about relationships, and I’d like to share a story with you about something that happened recently. One of my dear friends had a very emotionally charged and painful experience with a family friend she had known her whole life. Her mother, with whom he, too, had been close, had passed away, so she’d had a difficult year, but things were starting to look better.
One evening, this family friend came over with some wine. They ended up hooking up and had several subsequent romantic interludes that were filled with passion and his pronouncements of the deepest love he’d ever felt in his life. He planned to take her to Hawaii. They talked about meaningful things. But then it all went horribly wrong when she voiced the idea that they had a wonderful connection – which he agreed they did – and asked where they were taking it – what would be happening next or what his thoughts were.
He instantly got defensive and upset. It triggered him. He didn’t want to have that talk. So, rather than come over and sit down and discuss things, he decided to ice her out, and he cut her off completely. That withdrawal was so painful for her that it made her furious. They had one last heated argument when he finally did answer the phone, and when they hung up on each other, he told several family friends that she was…drumroll…CRAZY.
I feel kind of weird bringing this up, because it was so personal and difficult for my friend (who, by the way, approved this video), but it’s important that we voice these matters so that we can support one another when things like this happen. I have come to realize that there are a lot of situations where guys refer to women as “crazy.” In some cases, I am sure there are women who are dealing with disorders and issues that make them emotionally unstable. However, it seems to have become more acceptable to call women “crazy” (remember the “Crazy-Hot Matrix video?) than to call men crazy. And I would like to just point out that, in my friend’s situation, calling her crazy was unwarranted.
The whole reference to calling women crazy triggers something with me because, spiritually speaking, there is a whole huge energy exchange going on between men and women when they are in a relationship. Often, men will not express their emotions (or are taught to repress them). During a sexual exchange, a woman will run his energy through her and often unknowingly take it on as her own. Running someone else’s energy through you can be overwhelming and cause you to become more attached to the other person than you mean to be (that’s also due to the hormones that are released during sex).
The energetic connection between two people can be almost overpoweringly strong. That’s a whole other video! However, when a man refuses to communicate, or drops you and doesn’t want to talk about the relationship after running his energy through you, it can be devastating. Here you had what you thought was love, and a real connection, and it’s just gone, with no explanation, because he refuses to talk.
In an effort to understand what happens with guys, I have been doing research about men and what they go through. They do feel emotions (very much so) but for some men, the idea of having this long talk about where things are going when they aren’t sure they want a committed relationship is like water torture, or ripping the fingernails off of each finger. It’s scary and painful and a lot of guys run from confrontation because they think you are going to be sitting there crying and raging and being upset – at them. So, rather than have that conversation, they just run away and disappear.
But to be honest with you, the main gist of what I wanted to say in all of this is that it seems unkind of my friend’s former friend, who is spiritual, to tell people they mutually know that she is crazy. Yes, she is eccentric, and hilarious. Like all of us, she has an angry side. She also has a huge heart and is very loving and understanding. People can be themselves around her with no apologies. Yes, she’s fun and wacky, but is she crazy? No. Not at all.
I have a lot of clients calling about issues like this, and you know, this happens to people – men (and women, too) running off with no explanation. They come to someone like me for closure, to tell them what the other person is thinking, because the other person won’t tell them!
It’s unfortunate, but if you are going through this or have gone through this, it helps to know what’s going on with the other person. Knowing about their family history can really make a difference, for example. In many cases, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree! During her processing of all that happened, my friend remembered her friend’s dad would go away and leave the mom for weeks at a time. In turn, said friend walked out on his ex-wife and never spoke to her again, and voila – he did the same thing with her.
Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to have conversations about things rather than practice avoidance and name-calling? Though, in all honestly, I understand that most guys really don’t WANT to have to tell you they don’t want to see you again, or to make you cry. That’s why they don’t want to talk!!! But wouldn’t it be better to be able to talk than to run away or call each other names that are unfair and untrue?
Such a charged subject today! But interesting nonetheless, and the more we understand people and situations, the better we will be able to navigate them, and then heal.
Thanks for reading and watching. And remember, if there’s anything in your life that you would like assistance with, I’m here to help with readings, energy healings, on-demand meditations and my psychic development training program. So just reach out!